Sunday, December 27, 2009

adventures in sewing: camera case

santa was very kind to leave a new digital camera under the tree for me
(who am i kidding, i opened the box at the post office).
a sharp fuji f70exr that i am already in love with.
anyway, it was quite cold in the chilly colorado winter, so i decided it needed a little case to keep it warm (and scratch free).

i started out with two old shirts to be re-purposed. the stripes for the outside, and the gray tshirt for the inside lining.

i cut squares about 10x6 inches out of both fabrics.


i used a double sided interfacing to fuse the two fabrics together, and give the case a little padding and structure.

i squared everything up, and then sewed in the zipper (mom or dad, will one of you fly to colorado and teach me how to sew a zipper?).


















i sewed up the sides, turned it right side out, and proceeded to be very proud of myself.


thrifty fun

yesterday i went on the hunt for a cheap leather jacket that i could re-purpose into some craft projects. i went to the south side to visit the arc, a local thrift store similar to goodwill. i found some awesome deals!

first things first - i found a full length suede leather coat right off the bat, $7!


after that i wandered into the domestics sections, and scored 2 yards of this amazing woven wool fabric from pendleton.

and compared to the $54/yard pricetag on line, i think i did pretty well.


on the way back to the register, i wandered through the brick brack, and couldn't pass up a few small things.

this mug, which i want to turn into a pincushion similar to this.

and this little turtle. a pincushion as well, maybe?

Sunday, December 20, 2009

my first try at quilting! just a small wall hanging to get some practice in.

i started out piecing a few squares




















then i added some sashing around each square.
















i cut the back and batting, machine sewed the binding to the front, and hand sewed (with a ladder stitch) to the back.

















all the sewing was done on my lovely vintage singer:

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

i just hope he doesn't turn into a chia pet

our yard has been in a state of flux for over a week, in an attempt to have the grass replaced. for approximately 6 days, the lawn area has been bare dirt. the dog has avoided it like it was made of lava, and done his business in the gravel.

today, the landscapers put down manure, sowed grass seed and turned on the sprinklers. the dog that has not set foot on the lawn area for a week, decided today that it was perfect of a little romp, some pooping, and then TO SCOOTCH HIS BUTT ON.

Monday, May 18, 2009

choose your own adventure

your loved one has been paddling a canoe for approximately 3 hours. in the glaring sun. she is hot, tired and sweaty. do you:

a) inform her that she is paddling wrong? (turn to page 42 "get whacked in the head with a paddle")

b) declare that this isn't the specific half submerged tree limb you wanted her to paddle over to, and ask why she isn't listening (turn to page 11 "i told you we should have bought the effin' map")

c) point out that she is making too much noise and scaring all the fish (turn to page 6 "maybe you should just marry the fish if you love them so much")

d) tell her she is lovely (turn to page 8 "receive a sweet kiss")

Sunday, May 17, 2009

its always in the last place you look

~needs world's tiniest screwdriver~

~has world's tiniest screwdriver somewhere in the house~

~searches everywhere that world's tiniest screwdriver should be~

~does not find it~

~searches in places it is not likely to be, but could possibly have been misplaced in~

~does not find it~

~begins to search in places you would not normally put a tiny screwdriver: under the bathroom sink, sewing basket, silverwear chest, undewear drawer~

~does not find it~

~gives up looking, decides to try using the edge of a pair of tweezers~

~on way back out to garage, spots world's tiniest screwdriver hanging out in our key bowl by the mail~

~stares~

~shrugs~

~loosens world's tiniest screw with world's tiniest screwdriver~

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

cc: angry mob

memo

to: the person who cooked fish in the office microwave
from: everyone
re: we all hate you

your microwave privileges have been revoked. you are now required to eat cold hot pockets and crunchy ramen noodles for lunch. security has been informed to conduct a daily search of your lunch bag for seafood, cabbage, and microwave popcorn. you have been warned.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

the wii fit is trying to screw with me

exhibit a: put my mii in sweatpants and a belly shirt, and then made it fat

exhibit b: praised my reflexes, but then after skiing declared that i am "unbalanced." are you implying emotionally unbalanced? well? are you?

exhibit c: gave me a "personal trainer" that is either a mannequin from lady foot locker or a really active vampire

exhibit d: told me i have gained 3.5 pounds. in 24 hours. regular bathroom scale confirms only a 1 pound difference. lets face it, the bathroom scale and i have been together longer. so what are you trying to pull here?

Thursday, March 5, 2009

books on the amazon best seller list that describe my struggle to not eat the chocolate donuts in the vending machine

audacity of hope

eat this not that

the omnivores dilemma

the great depression ahead

the tipping point

meltdown

run for your life

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

ways i have attempted to get the neighbors daschund to shut the hell up

  • glared at it out the window
  • opened the back door and yelled at it
  • stood on the porch and yelled at it
  • stood on the other side of the fence and yelled at it
  • tried to bribe it with organic lamb and chicken treats through the fence
  • tried to bribe it by throwing organic lamb and chicken treats in the yard
  • threatened to tell its father
  • threatened to call the dog pound
  • threatened to roast it on a tiny spit
  • showed it the cookbook from which i will get the recipe for daschund stew
  • cried

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

i'm not a good hostess, apparently

what i do to prepare for guests:
  • vacuum
  • pick up dirty laundry
  • put clean sheets on spare bed
  • wash dishes

what i should do to prepare for guests, according to martha stewart:
  • clean the guest room with a handmade cleanser of baking soda, lavender, and tears of joy
  • starch and iron sheets for maximum illusion that guests are staying in a four star hotel
  • stock the guest bath with special soaps and lotions; provide several towels made from 100% egyptian cotton hand picked by mother teresa
  • place a vase with single flower on nightstand, along with a selection of books the guest might enjoy and a small piece of your soul in a handmade pottery bowl

things I have said to friends during arguments

(subtitled: why i'll probably die alone)


"if you can't tolerate someone having an opinion and expressing it, you need more self esteem."

"if its true that you constantly go home and cry because of something i say, why is this the first i ever hear about it?"

"...and you can't say i haven't tried my best, because i was trying months before you even noticed there was a problem."

"i'm not asking you to cater to what i want. i'm laying down the ground rules for being my friend."

" i'm sure shouting at him through the floor is probably the best way to handle that situation"

"and while we're talking about growing and changing, maybe you could not stab someone just for trying to tell you that they are upset. that someone being me."

"i just say the things you're thinking, and you know it."